“He’s just attention seeking, if you give him attention it won’t do him any good” – this phrase and words to these effect are typical words we hear as parents and professionals. When you see a child tugging on their parents
What happens when you slow down? When you stop the running around, dashing from one place to the next, focused on what’s coming and what needs to be done. What do you see, feel and hear when you can slow yourself
My kids love to run. They run from the bedroom to the bathroom, they run downstairs, they run to the car, they run from the car into school. All day they run. It struck me this morning as I dropped them
What is it about birthdays? They come once a year – just one day but they can hold so much in them – memories, anticipation, sadness, happiness, surprises and shocks sometimes! It’s my birthday today and as ever it’s got me
I’ve been thinking about change recently. With Christmas and the change in routines, then back to school and work and the readjustments again to the routine, and then this week with the snow that routine has gone out the window again
Enabling children to be in the right frame of mind, or state of mind more like, to be able to learn is quite difficult for traumatised children. Due to the anxiety they feel and the reptilian part of the brain that
Those of you who work with vulnerable children in any capacity know that understanding their needs is the bedrock of being able to connect with them. A child who has experienced trauma in their early life will have developed coping strategies
Which brings me to my final question – what do we hope to achieve by rewarding children? In the traditional sense with our reward charts and sliding scales of behaviour charts we are hoping they will tow the line and conform
Yesterday we looked at what we reward children for …… today our second question – why do we feel the need to reward children? We are told that what you focus on is what you get and I can see that. The
Something I’m asked time and again, whilst doing training for schools, is how can we use rewards effectively with children who’ve experienced trauma? Well there are a few fundamental questions we have to ask ourselves first:- What are we rewarding children
Building trust Trust is the foundation of relationships. We know that relationships have failed our children in many ways. They don’t feel the basic level of trust that other children do, so they constantly question our motives and are looking for
Emotional age vs chronological age When we are stressed we all regress, but for our children that regression can be shocking. An 11 year old for example may regress to behave like a 5 year old under extreme stress. This makes
Education is a constant battle for most children who have experienced early trauma. My husband and I have three adopted children who all struggle to one degree or another with their school. Whilst it is a small, caring, understanding school that
My daughter has just started at High School…..what a see saw of emotions. For children who have experienced trauma, and as a result have attachment difficulties, big transitions like this can be very difficult. Whilst she seems to be taking it
At a conference I was at recently Louise Bomber the author of ‘Inside I’m Hurting’ made a comment on how to help children deal with the difficult sides to their emotions – the anger, the frustration, the shame. She talked about the fact
You’ve heard that quote right – “there’s nothing to fear but fear itself” – fear is such a strange emotion – there are so many different levels and degrees of fear, hundreds of fearful situations and our responses to those situations
What would you say is the most important attribute to being a good teacher? The knowledge needed on the subject you teach? The ability to maintain control and discipline of a classroom? Being up to date on the current issues children
Dr Bruce Perry is one of my favourite gurus on early trauma in children. Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D., is an internationally-recognised authority on children in crisis. Dr. Perry is the Provincial Medical Director in Children’s Mental Health for the Alberta
