This weeks theme for our blog buddies post is ‘build’ and a song by Newton Faulkner has been running around my head – especially these few lines:-
Of course it’s better if you hear the song but these words have meant a lot to me over the last 6 years since we’ve had our children. Sometimes it’s been difficult to see the progress and just how far we’ve come as a family but it is the slowly building brick by brick that makes the difference. At times they seem to make huge strides in their development. We went to a family fun evening at Church tonight and as I watched them playing with others, running around, interacting with the many children and adults there I just took a moment to be thankful for where we are at right now. There are many times when it’s hard to see that but today I felt like they are growing up nicely. Their foster carers were there as they are members of our Church and it was great to see the children interacting with them in such a comfortable way and then coming back to me for comfort and/or things they wanted.
In all areas of our lives when you are up close it can seem like a mess. Think about a beautiful painting if you stand with your face right against it you can’t see the full picture – you just see the mess of colours, textures and shapes in front of you. However when you take a step back you can see the context and the whole picture which gives a very different perspective. As I stepped back tonight from the daily grind of parenting I could see that we have moved on – step by step and brick by brick. Each day there are chances to have moments of connection and attunement with my children and the more I can do that the more we move forward as a family – some days those moments are few and far between but they are there.
So I’m hoping that as we build our lives together slowly brick by brick that eventually there will be a solid structure that our children can build their lives on. In my training with schools I talk about the fact that many children don’t have the solid foundation in their early years – they haven’t had the nurture and care they should have had which means that anything else we try to build onto will be hard for them to accept – they just don’t have the foundations to build on. What we’re doing as parents and as educators I believe is trying to build those bricks back in for them – giving the structure that they need to build the rest of their lives on – brick by brick. The more we can all help children to do that the more chance they have of developing their lives in a positive way. We all have a part to play in this – whether we have our own children, work with or look after other peoples children or interact with children in the community – we all need to see our relationship with children as helping them to build the essential building blocks that will give them the resilience they need to succeed in their lives.
Whether you need to take a step back in your own life today and see the progress you have made or just look around and see how you can help children build solid foundations I hope that you will take that action to build – brick by brick by brick by brick.