I’ve been reluctant to write anything during this very weird time in lockdown. I don’t know why. Maybe because it’s just so strange a time? Or there are so many mixed emotions that I can’t make a coherent thought from them? Or that my own bereavement is overshadowing the global and national loss right now? I don’t know but what I do know is that writing helps me to process those thoughts – so here I am.
I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with social media. I use it but also dislike the disconnection it can make us feel sometimes. But now I am so thankful for it and so reliant on it to feel even a slight link to those outside my four walls. The special occasions in life have been reduced to photos, videos or zoom calls – in our own family we’ve had a funeral, a birth, wedding anniversaries and birthdays. I know many celebrations have been cancelled and events that people looked forward to and probably paid a lot towards – weddings particularly. I wonder what you are missing the most? Here’s a short video of some people from my church talking about what they will do once lockdown is over. I don’t know what I will do first, but I do know what I am realising and learning during this time….
- I need connection. I knew this already, that I am a sociable person, an extrovert you might say (not all the time). Whilst I love some of the quiet and space to read etc I am so missing being around human beings in person. I’m reading a brilliant Brene Brown book at the moment called ‘The Gifts of Imperfection’, in one of the early chapters she talks about the definition of belonging – it’s not about fitting in. Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be to be accepted (we’re doing a bit of adapting at the moment) but belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are’. I miss being with people who get me and who allow me to be me!
- Relationships need time. I love my family and do spend time with them usually but not this much!! Whilst there may be more arguments and annoyance with each other I have loved the simplicity of activities and time together. Also it’s made me aware of those relationships outside of my home that I’d like to work on more and give more time to. Just hanging out together is a lost art. We seem to need to always be doing something, going somewhere. These weeks and what may be months of taking time to play card games, read, do jigsaws together and just be have been great. I want them to be part of our ‘normal’ life once all this is over.
- Not much actually really matters. It’s amazing that a nation and a world can come together over something like this – worries about health, wealth and wellbeing have brought us all together. Our differences seem to be irrelevant against our similarities. We’re all in this together – as a famous song once stated. My daily work has gone, my coffee shop visits and trips to the cinema gone, my much-loved restaurant meals gone and driving around our beautiful country gone. BUT it’s ok. All is well. Actually, more than well. This too shall pass, and maybe we’ll have learnt more about how to rest and be at peace.
So now as I head into afternoon birthday lockdown celebrations for my hubby (cake and an escape game with the kids) I wish you well and will definitely be writing more from lockdown next week.
I’ve been following a few people who have helped me to make sense of this current situation – I don’t agree with all they say and do in their lives but it has made me think and entertained me too. None of them children or trauma related for a change. If it helps you then great…..if you have others you are being inspired by please let me know.