Sometimes when you look back on your life and the plans you had when you were younger you might feel some regret at things you’ve not done. You may have wanted to climb Everest, leap out of a plane, become a popstar or astronaut. Or being a bit more realistic maybe – get married, have children, be in a job you love, make a difference in the world. Disappointment can be a horrible thing. Thinking you’ve not achieved what you wanted to can really drag you down and make you feel that you won’t ever achieve your dream.
However, today I’ve got a different take on regret and dreams not met. What about thinking about those things you never thought you would do and you have? Those things that may be weren’t on your dream list but as you look back on them you might say “Wow, I never imagined I’d be able to do that”.
So here’s my list – join me in coming up with your own list of amazingness. Of course they are very personal to each one of us – you may look at mine and think “well what’s so special about doing that – that’s easy” – but for me it may have been a huge leap and something I thought I would never do.
In doing this exercise I think it changes our focus from loss to gain. So I haven’t become a popstar (yet) but I have achieved amazing things in my life that I would never imagined possible.
- Raising three adopted children – an amazement to me every day! Not proud of how I do this sometimes but I’m still amazed that I am, and we are a family journeying this road to recovery together.
- Being a dog owner – I’ve been a dog avoider all my life – hated them actually. Now I have a puppy that I love even though I have no clue what I’m doing most days!
- Running my own business – this has huge challenges but again something I never thought I would do. I imagined I’d work in a large corporate company all my life with safety and security and others to help me.
- Writing – I barely passed any exams at school, English was about my best subject but even so I never thought I would be a writer and a published author (still sounds strange).
- Love being on my own – when I was younger I couldn’t be on my own, it scared me. I needed people around to feel loved and accepted. Now I crave that time alone to recharge and I know much more who I am and my value.
- Working in education – as I said earlier I didn’t do well in school actually disliked the experience. Now every week I stand in front of educators and talk about how to help and support vulnerable children – it may be because I can identify a bit with the anxiety of school. But again something I never would have thought I’d do – when I left school I never wanted to go into a school again!
I’m sure there’s more but for the sake of not boring you my dear reader I will stop. Please write your own list as you might be surprised at just how much you have achieved that yes they may not have been on your dream list when you were younger – but how amazing are they? There’s always stepping stones to where we end up in life – things seem to snowball and often out of disappointment or adversity. So for us not being able to give birth to children has led to a whole lifestyle change – my work, my home life, my friendships, my purpose has all changed as a result – something I thought I would never do but it’s resulted in so many good things in my life, for which I’m very grateful.